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good ol boys in tennessee
Two Tennesee mountain boys, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their
favorite bar, drinking beer. Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm
tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll
go to the community college and sign up for some classes."
Bob thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave.
The next day Jim goes down to the college and meets the dean of
admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: math, English,
history, and logic.
Logic?" Jim says. "What's that?"
The dean says, "I'll show you. Do you own a weed eater?"
"Yeah."
"Then logically because you own a weed eater, I think that you would
have a yard."
"That's true, I do have a yard."
"I'm not done," the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think
logically that you would have a house."
"Yes, I do have a house."
"And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a
family."
"I have a family."
"I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then
logically you must have a wife."
"Yes, I do have a wife."
"And because you have a wife, then logically you must be a
heterosexual."
"I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of
that because I have a weed eater."
Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the dean's hand and leaves to
go meet Bob at the bar.
He tells Bob about his classes, how he is signed up for math, English,
history, and logic.
"Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?"
Jim says, "I'll show you. Do you have a weed eater?"
"No."
"Yore queer ain'tcha Bob."
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i am not he, nor master, nor lord no crown to wear, no cross to bear in stations i am not he, nor shall be, warlord of nations these heroes have run before me, now dead upon the flesh piles, see? waiting for their promised resurrection, there is none nothing but the marker crown or cross in stone upon these graves. i'll neither live nor die for your dreams i'll make no subscription to your paradise
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