[Remedyz]

Does anyone read the Synergy section? I did today, this was what I found.

To Whom It May Concern:

This letter is in regard to an atrocity currently being experienced by residents of the third floor of poling. It is a problem creating emotional, physical, and sociological damages that without immediate attention will result in deleterious long term effects. I would prefer to never think of the ramifications of ignoring such a heinous crime.



I present to you, to whom it may concern, exhibit A:



Beyond the incredible exterior of this tremendously well kept bathroom, you may notice the misplaced door on the third stall, which will hence forth be referred to as the poopin' stall. Men of Poling third floor have developed a bond with the poopin' stall. A bond which will never be broken. When a man gains comfort in his lavatory he will not be willing to surrender his porcelain throne easily. For some men of the third floor this bond has developed over several years, for others over the course of a year, and some simply have anxiety about poopin' in public places. I fall into the latter of the three categories and find it necessary to inform you of my horrible experience when I first used this grand lavatory. Upon entering the lavatory for the first time, seeking some poopin' relief, I looked at the first stall, which will hence forth be referred to as the pissin' stall. The door was wide open, there was urine covering not only the toilet seat, but also the floor I was standing on. Bill Gates has enough money to pay me to do my duty here, but OSU does not, and UHDS certainly does not.

I stepped about 6 inches to my left to find that the 2nd stall, which will now be called the buffer stall, also had urine on the floor, obviously from the flood of the first stall. This was also an unfit choice not only because of the urine on the floor, but if you committed yourself to do your poopin' business in this stall you could possibly end up with the worst thing any man can imagine: A man poopin' on your right, and a man poopin' on your left.

As I stepped in front of the poopin' stall I realized how easy my decision was. I enjoyed doing my poopin' business in this extraordinary stall. It was a spacious stall, the floor free of urine and a Niagara-like flushing power to keep my consistent reproduction of giant logs flowing through. I fell in love with the poopin' stall.

Approximately 6 weeks ago, the men of third floor Poling woke up to the worst problem any of them had ever faced in their entire college tenure; someone had stolen the poopin' stall door. First shock set in, quickly followed by sheer disappointment and finally capped off by an inhuman rage only comparable to that of another man who had just learned he can no longer do his poopin' business in comfort.

It took only an hour for the men of third floor to acquire the resources necessary to rectify the situation. We readied the troops, created a plan of attack, and used our element of surprise to besiege the lavatory. In merely seconds, the shower curtain from the retro 1950's bathtub was being used as the door for our holy poopin' stall.

Peace was restored to the land at last and the men of third floor were reunited with their stall of choice.

I wish this is where the story could end.

But alas, I must continue.


I would now like to bring to your attention exhibit B:




I would like to point out that our shower curtain, like our door, was also burglarized. And they managed to pilfer the toilet paper as well.

The men of Poling's third floor can only assume the worst. It was a direct order from UHDS to the woman who cleans our lavatory to remove these essential items. I would recommend returning the aforementioned items before myself and the other men of Poling third floor begin to search for other areas in the lavatory to find comfort in their poopin' business (Exhibit C).

http://forums.livingwithstyle.com/sh...d.php?t=269402


Laugh

[ILuvSmurfs]

Lolol

[Negative]

I enjoyed the "lawyer-like" tone to the whole article.

[GeneralMalice[sh]]

they can take or door. but thell never take or pooper.....